Monday, March 29, 2010

the (inside) story

Do you ever get that feeling where you don't want to talk to anybody?
You don't want to smile and you don't want to fake being happy.
But at the same time you don't know exactly what's wrong either.
There isn't a way to explain it to someone who doesn't already understand.
If you could want anything in the world it would be to be alone.
People have stopped being comforting and being alone never was.
At least when you're alone no one will constantly ask you what is wrong
& there isn't anyone who won't take 'I don't know' for an answer.
You feel the way you do just because. You hope the feeling will pass soon
& that you will be able to be yourself again,
but until then all you can do is wait.

* * * * *

Silly boy;
of course I like you.
It's because I like you that I don't want to be with you.
It's a complicated emotion.

You piss me off.
You piss me off a lot, everyday.
I can't even tell you how many times I’ve wanted to knock some sense into that big egoistic head of yours.
You push me to my limits and maybe even farther,
but this is what makes me so absolutely crazy about you.
Does that even make any sense at all?

Just one day, you & I will finish our unfinished business.
& maybe fall madly in love again.

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